July 1st, 2010 at 8:06 am
(Damien, Vacation)
Yesterday as we were going to the park, Grandpa had to move his car far out to the side of the road to let another car pass. As he he did so he drove over a patch of grass near the construction site, and ran over an exposed sharp piece of metal hiding in the grass which instantly punctured his tire. So we couldn’t go right away, and it took us awhile to get the other car out due to a stuck garage door.
Later in the evening I cam across this drawing, which Damien had made to describe the situation very well, in my opinion, what do you think?
Damien's drawing of Grandpa getting a flat tire.
6 Comments
June 30th, 2010 at 6:25 pm
(Damien, New, Parenting Tip, Sergey)
Sergey: Papa Papa!!! Where are you?
Papa: Upstairs
Sergey enter the room his voice already heavy with a nasal whine.
Sergey: Papa Damien punched me.
Papa: Go down stairs and tell him not to do that.
Sergey: But Papa he punched me two times.
Parenting tip: Sibling fights are never what they seem, always dig deeper.
Papa: What did you do?
Sergey: Nothing
Papa: Well what happened before he punched you?
Sergey: I hit him.
Papa: Sounds like you started it, and are mad that Damien hit you back.
Sergey: No I hit him one time then he punched me two times.
Papa: Still sounds like you started it.
Sergey: No Damien started it, we were watching TV and he was being loud and I couldn’t hear ANYTHING so I hit him, and he still wasn’t quite so I hit him again, and then and then.
Sergey pauses to catch hi breath.
Sergey: And then he punched me two times.
Parenting Tip: I feel my role is to give my children solutions to problems, instead of solving them.
Papa: Maybe you should use your words instead of hitting, go down stairs, and tell Damien to not be so loud.
Sergey leaves looking disappointed.
You will probably find more parenting stuff, because while I am leaving Russia early to go to my new job, the kids will be staying here with the grandparents, and they have started asking me how I manage the kids, so I will just post them here, them maybe translate them to Russian.
3 Comments
June 29th, 2010 at 5:33 pm
(Damien, My Kids, Parenting Tip, Sergey, Vacation, Xavier)
The grandparents bought a bike for Damien to ride on, so when they took him out to the back ally to ride on I went and got the camera. When I got outside Damien and Sergey were already coming back into the back yard.
Grandma was following them looking disseminated. She said that Damien did not really try and that he gave up too fast. I looked around at what a nice day it was, and the nice bike they bought, and at Damien happy and having a good time, then I decided he is getting his butt on that bike right now.
Damien was taking his cloth off while Sergey went for a dip in the pool.
Sergey in mini pool with pienis cropped out, for modesty
But I soon convinced Damien he should put his cloths back on and practice riding the bike.
Parenting Tip: How to form a compelling and logical argument to convince you child to do what you want.
Me : Damien it’s time to get your cloths on and ride your bike.
Damien: But I wanna go in the pool.
Me: You are going to because it is a great day to ride your bike.
Damien: But I don’t want to.
Me: You are going to do it.
Damien: But why?
Me: Because I said so, and I am the Papa.
See what I did there with my two pronged argument.
“Because I said so“, which is 100% true, I did say it, and “I am the Papa“, also 100% true.
The reason it works is because Damien knows that I when I start to say certain phrases like the ones above that I will drag his but over there and make him do it if I have to.
Parenting Tip: Sometime you have to be the taskmaster, but go back to being their buddy as soon as possible.
The tendency for me is that once I get mad, and go into Taskmaster Mode, that I stay there too long, and everything starts to fall apart. I find it is best to lay down the law, then embrace the child (literally), and move on as if nothing had happened. Kids are smart, they know when they have done wrong, any corrective action should be short and sweet.
So in no time were out in the alley and Damien was riding his bike, with Grandma holding him up.
Grandma helping Damien ride a bike in alley
I took a turn holding him up, and what I realized was that to help Damien the most, I needed to do the least effort I could, be there to catch him before he falls not there to push him along or steer him in the right direction. I am not very pro training wheels, because that was I was doing really, but I am sure he liked me there more than training wheels.
While we were there Grandpa came back with Xavier from a walk up and down the alley.
Grandpa walking Xavier in the stroller down the alley
Once side of the back alley borders a park, and no cars are supposed to use this area though one self centered neighbor does, (but no one likes him,) so it is almost like a nature trail.
3 Comments
June 25th, 2010 at 10:17 am
(Damien, New, Sergey, Song, Vacation)
I think the the boys and I have caught a bug, I felt bad last night, but I did get 8 hours of sleep, and I was still so tired today that I took 2 naps for over an hour each, very uncharacteristic of me, also Damien slept in, for several hours, and he was the first to fall asleep last night, and Damien almost never naps. Yesterday Sergey and Xavier were not feeling well, so I am hoping we are on the tail end of what ever it is, at least we are all sleeping through the night.
On the plus side I got my first chapter done in “Configuring Windows Server 2008 Active Directory”, The first 2/3rds of the chapter is a real slog, but once I got to the Lessons it seamed very straight forward, so here is hoping the rest of the book will be easier. Also it looks like I could change my certification to just Systems Administrator, and have fewer tests to take, or maybe that was just fewer required tests, with more elective, but still needing the same number of tests.
Damien was asking what “Spam” meant, so I decided to show him, and had him and Sergey watch the Monty Python Spam skit, which is where the reference comes from.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_eYSuPKP3Y
At first they were uninterested, but once it started playing they demanded that I start it from the beginning and be able to see it clearly.
In the end Sergey says he does not like Spam, and Damien walked out of the room singing the Spam song.
4 Comments
June 21st, 2010 at 6:50 pm
(Damien, My Kids, New, Parenting Tip, Sergey, Vacation, Xavier)
Well I made it to Russia.
Apparently if I didn’t go then the kids couldn’t go either, so I definitely had to go.
Problems started before the plane left the gate.
There was a freak thunderstorm that hit the area, my first clue was that the plane was shaking and rocking. While this is fairly normal behavior in the air it is quite surprising on the ground when partially protected by the airport and boarding ramp. That is when we got our first delay for about 40 minutes.
Then after the storm, there were no workers allowed on the airfield far an additional 15 minuets after the last lightning strike.
Finally we made it to the runway and we were third in line, then second in line, then first in line and we just sat there. Apparently it was OK for the other two planes to take off but not for us as the tower was not giving us a flight number, so the plane could not take off.
By this time I was already on my second bag of candy just trying to keep the kids under control.
I had a special harness for Xavier to wear that made his seat belt secure (since yes he did have his own seat, it’s an 8 hour flight. The extra seat came in handy for sleeping and wrestling.), Xavier just screamed his head off the entire takeoff, so I lifted up the armrest between us, and hugged him as best I could and sang songs to him as best I could, it worked more or less.
After that I just asked for a lap harness for Xavier since that is where he wanted to be anyway.
The lap harness is like an extra belt that loops through your belt and can be buckled around the child to keep the secured. Mine kept slipping off, which is a real pain trying to recover from the floor while holding a baby on your lap. My suggestion is to loop your belt through the lap belt twice this will stop the lap belt from slipping off, it may seem awkward but it much easier than fishing it off the floor every time you undo your belt.
Damien spent the time either drawing, watching movies, drawing, sleeping or drawing. Thanks honey, for packing the colored pencils and coloring books and drawing pad. Sergey didn’t want pencils or crayons, so on one of his journeys throughout the cabin he found a marker (yellow highlighter), which he proceeded to use for coloring purposes, and then complain that (under the low light of the cabin) it didn’t look like he had done anything. Xavier was a pain most of the trip, yup that is about as nice as I can put it.
When going to the bathroom I would have to take Xavier, so after waiting in line, then sitting there doing my business, I hear Sergey wandering up and down calling for me. That was a fun conversation I am sure.
Sergey: Papa, Papa where are you?
Me: I am in the bathroom.
Xavier: Whaaaa.
Sergey: Papa what are you doing?
Me: What do you thing I am doing?
Xavier: Whaaaa!
Sergey: Papa I want to go somewhere?
Me: We are going to Russia?
Xavier: Whaaaa!
Sergey: But Papa I want to go outside?
Me: We can’t go outside it’s against the rules?
Xavier: Whaaaa!
Sergey: But why?
Me: Because we are in an airplane, at 37,000 feet, and if we go outside we will fall to our death, and if for some reason we don’t die from the fall the sharks will get us?
Xavier: Whaaaa!
Sergey: But I wanna?
Me: Can’t this wait till we get back to our seats?
There were lots of other children and babies on this flight and mine were the quietest (go me), I was actually getting compliments from other passengers and attendants on how well behaved my children were. One thing I did do is really crack down on the boy when they put their feat on the chair in front of them, since that is a peeve of mine being kicked in the back for hours, I thought I should try to spare other the pain as much as I could.
Luckily our second flight was after a two hour layover, so we didn’t have to rebook.
The worst part was that in Stockholm, the airport proper is much higher than the plains which means that there are escalators used to get down to your plane. We were the only people in sight when we entered the boarding area. I noticed the escalator and was in the process of gathering my things so I could carry Xavier down, when I turned to look at the boys, Xavier (the brave one) had decided to step on while the other older boys looked on, not sure if it was safe to enter. So I ushered the other boys on in front of me so as not to leave any stranded at the top. Now Damien had been doing a great job with his own carry on that was sized for kids and it was light as it mostly had his coloring supplies and jackets. When Damien got on the escalator it nudged his bag at him, as he tried to correct the problem, the bag came loose and headed down the escalator right at Xavier’s head, there was nothing I could do but swear, so that is what I did. Xavier had through the escalator was a ride so he had sat down to enjoy it, you could tell he was happy as he was singing to himself and bopping his head. Then SMASH the little carry on that could blasted him right off his perch and sent him face first down the last few stairs of the escalator, lucky for him that he had a big head start as there was not far to fall, but it looked awful. Damien was immediately apologizing and say it was an accident, but I knew it was and let him know that I was not mad at him, just at what happened. Xavier just lay there crying as the escalator churned on. He has some scrapes on his chest, but they look like they will heal, and he was acting fine before I buckled him into his seat.
I’ll pick up here later.
3 Comments
April 27th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
(Damien, My Kids, New)
Damien would like to take this time to let everyone know that he no longer wants a baby brother.
Brother Sergey is OK, and Papa and Mama are OK, but Xavier is right out.
According to Damien “I like playing with brother Sergey but not Xavier, he is no fun I don’t want babies anymore Papa, I just want big little brothers like Sergey”.
“He is not cool” says Damien when asked about his brother Xavier.
Why is he not cool? “Because he keeps following me” says Damien.
Also “He keeps taking all of my legos” adds Damien.
Damien’s solution:
Damien: “Put him back in the baby store”.
What about Sergey?
Damien: “He is my best friend”.
4 Comments
March 9th, 2010 at 7:27 pm
(Damien, Swimming)
Damien’s first day of swim class without a parent.
Damien was fine I on the other hand had to force myself to turn him over to the instructor at the door. Two of the other Mom’s decided to carry their child all the way to pool side, which only made the separation worse.
Damien was the most positive and fearless student. You could clearly hear him answer with an enthusiastic “YES” to each request the teacher had, like who wants to jump in the water, or who want to swim with a fun noodle.
The most fun for him was when he learned that he could bounce off the bottom of the pool, so that he was not in immediate fear of drowning.
He pretended to “fish” with the fun noodle while waiting his turn to swim. Then he got the other kids to join in. He hasn’t hit anyone yet, yet. Then he pretended to lose his noodle accidentally on purpose, just so he could reach for it and fall in on “accident”. Mostly so he could bounce off the bottom some more.
Damien swam back and forth, with his fun noodle, on his front and on his back, and didn’t panic or freak out, I was very proud of him; even though he was with the teacher all the time.
When it’s Cally’s turn, he tries to fish her out of the pool with his fun noodle as she swims back and forth.
2 Comments
December 23rd, 2009 at 10:52 pm
(Damien, New, Talk, Uncategorized)
Well Damien has been diagnosed with a “Language Disorder”, rather than a “Language Delay”. A language delay will go away with time, however, a language disorder is there forever. On the plus side we know what we are dealing with and while language will always be difficult for Damien, he would still be able to graduate from college, some aspects will just be more difficult for him.
If you think about language as a brick wall, most people use various bricks to build the wall they need at the moment. Damien is having a hard time seeing the bricks in the wall, he just sees walls, so he tends to build prefabricated walls.
The way to help Damien is Speech Therapy, which will help give him a wider range of prefabricated walls to use, as well as special tools for Damien to begin building his own walls.
Originally our insurance was not going to cover the the Speech Therapy, because even though Damien was diagnosed with a Language Disorder, the insurance company classified it as a Language Delay, which they don’t cover.
Well Olya kept after the Insurance company, and no we have the go ahead for 40 sessions next year. Our doctor is suspicious though, so she has scheduled only three of them so far, and they take place every other week, just in case the insurance company changes their mind on covering it, at least we won’t be out too much money.
I am just happy that Damien is getting closer to getting more assistance that aid him in communicating with his peers and brothers.
5 Comments
December 22nd, 2009 at 10:41 am
(Damien, My Kids, New, Sergey, Xavier)
I decided to take notes on paper about what the kids do, because as soon as I go on my computer, they they start acting out. So with a note book, I can just jot down some things while I am watching them, and the note book in much more portable, and takes less time to set up, no spell check but those are the breaks.
Currently (as of this writing) the boys are acting great. Damien is reading a book to Sergey, while Xavier is spinning himself silly in the swing. When the story that Damien makes up is over, they sings songs, such as the ever popular “ABC’s”.
Sergey is actively encouraging Damien to read to him, he often takes several of Mom’s books off the shelf and sneaks them over to Damien for translation. Being as the books have no pictures, Sergey has no idea what the books are about, but that doesn’t stop Damien he doesn’t need pictures to make up a story, just a book.
Xavier did make a big mess by grabbing a container of crayons and dumping them on the floor, then trying to spread them around evenly. It is partly the other boys fault as well, as one of them did not put the crayons far enough out of Xavier’s way (this is something that we have been working on with them for some time, so it is expected).
![DSC_1369[1]](http://billtheannoying.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/DSC_13691-300x199.jpg "DSC_1369[1]")
Since they are so good now, I don’t feel like busting them at the moment that would send the wrong message, I just wait for them to act badly, I don’t expect it to be a long wait.
Minutes later…
Everyone was given a plastic container, and told to pick up the crayons. After a brief legal battle with Damien and Sergey, cleaning did take place, even Xavier helped pick them up.
5 Comments
December 21st, 2009 at 12:35 pm
(Damien, New)
A while back we went to the Dentist with the kids.
Damien was not on his best behavior, as he would not open his mount for the dentist to get a good look.
So we will have to take him to a dentist that focuses on children for him.
The kids all got new cleaning kits, complete with toothbrush, toothpaste, and floss.
When it came time to brush teeth, a fight broke out over who would get to use the green tooth brush.
Since Sergey was given the green toothbrush by the dentist, and Damien the blue one, we decided to stick with that. Needless to say Damien was not happy with this. That is Damien’s logical thinking reared it’s ugly head.
“Papa I can’t use the blue tooth brush“, said Damien, “It’s broke“. Damien held up the blue tooth brush which now had a 90 degree bend in the neck. “See“, he said, “I have to use the green one because this one is broke“, and he made a grab for the green toothbrush. “No it’s OK“, I said, “it just got bent, by accident, here let em straighten it out“; so I straighten the blue brush out, and used it to clean his teeth.
The next night the blue brush was broke again, on this time more permanently, he had snapped the head of the toothbrush clean off. So I brushed his teeth with the broken end of the blue brush and still wouldn’t let him have the green toothbrush.
The day after that, Damien had to go to the bathroom, but since Sergey was in the downstairs bathroom, Damien decided that he must use the bathroom upstairs. After a few minutes I checked on him, and found him closing the drawers in the bathroom, and running out as soon as he saw me. After a moments inspection the coveted green toothbrush was now also broken, having it’s head removed.
So that night during teeth brushing time, we talked about how you can’t just break things to get what you want. I also gave Sergey a new (more solid) green toothbrush, and continued to brush Damien’s teeth with the broken end of the blue toothbrush. After brushing I put all the toothbrushes away in the linen closet, because even though the new green toothbrush is more solid, so is Damien’s determination, and I think the toothbrush would lose that showdown.
I did tell Damien that if he is good, that Santa will probably give him a new toothbrush.
Comments